Before we get too far into the big job of raising girls, let me just say that I’m so glad you stopped by!  If this is your first time here, welcome.  You will find great content on SELF CAREPARENTING, RELATIONSHIPS & MARRIAGE  and more.  THIS IS A GOOD PLACE TO START.

I’m going to say something and I want you to tell me the first thing that comes to your mind.

Raising girls can be…

Well…what did you say?

Amazing?  Hard?  A breeze?  A nightmare?

Chances are your answer depends on the day…or, more likely, the minute.

If you are the mother of a daughter, then you know exactly what I mean.  

Between all the tears, emotions, giggles and glitter, raising girls can be an exhausting task.  

Yet, exhausting as it may be, it is one of the most important to-do’s that we will ever be given.  

It is no secret that the world we live in shouts to our girls telling them who they should be, what they should be, and how they should be.  

But in a world grasping for their attention, our voice should be the only one they hear.  

The voice we whisper into our girls should drown out every other one desperately screaming for their attention. Click To Tweet

I often think about what I want to teach my little ladies…the words I want them to internalize even if I am not always by their sides.

So I sat down to give ink to the voice I want to share with them.  My hope is that the whisper in this message will be the one they hear…and that it will resonate with them long after I’m gone.  

THE ULTIMATE GUIDE TO RAISING GIRLS:  50 THINGS YOU CAN TEACH THEM THAT WILL MAKE IT EASIER 

1. You are strong.

2. You are brilliant.

3. You are beautiful.

4. Reread #1, #2 and #3.  Tell those things to yourself daily, and hear me telling them to you, too.

5. You are worthy of a grand adventure.

6. Don’t ever settle for something because it is comfortable.  Set your bar high and don’t consider lowering it for anyone or anything.

7. You will mirror whoever you spend time with…choose wisely.

8. Make your bed.  Just do it.  It sets your day up for success.  

9. Be kind to yourself.

10. Be kind to others.

11. Always say what you mean.  Do not assume that people know what you mean or what you feel.  They don’t.   

12. Feeling emotion is not a weakness.

13. Do not make a decision, big or small, based on emotion.  Give the highs time to settle and then decide.  Remember this:  It takes a long time to grow out bangs…

14. When you feel sad, do something for someone else.  Being someone else’s smile will help you find yours again.

15. Baking cookies can cure almost anything.

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16. Always fill your cup first.  You need to be full before you can pour into others.

17. The things you love won’t ever go out of style.  Wear what you love with confidence.

18. A good bargain is something to be proud of.  Find things you like, hold your head up high and never let someone shame you for what you have.

19. Don’t be afraid to spend money, but spend it wisely.  Find ways to make your money work for you.

20. Do not lie.  Not to anyone.  Not about anything.  Trust is easy to lose and hard to earn back.  Sometimes it hurts to face the truth, but in the end, it is much better to deal with than a lie.  Lies will eat you up from the inside out.

21. Learn to be a communicator.  Good communication will bring you loads of success.

22. Resentment and contempt will rot your heart.  Forgive even if they don’t ask for it.  Be like Elsa and let it go.

23. Take care of yourself even when no one is looking.  Eat real food, keep moving your body, and always love yourself.

24. Doctor Who and Harry Potter are fabulous.  Much like baking cookies, their adventures can cure a multitude of sadness.  

25. You’d do well to remember that nerds run the world.

26. Never apologize for who you are or for who you want to become.

27. People can be mean…girls especially.  Don’t be a mean girl.

28. Remember that when you send a text or make a post, ANYONE COULD END UP SEEING IT.  So before you publish, think Would I want Mom to see this???

29. I’m sure you’ll fight me on this, but the person you like and date in your teen years will not be the one you marry.  The person you are when you are fourteen is totally different than who you are at eighteen.  And the person you are at eighteen is different than who you are at twenty-five.  Use your late teens and early adulthood to figure out who you are and where you want to go.  It is extremely difficult to do this with another person…and most relationships don’t make it through the process.  Do yourself a favor and don’t be in such a rush.  High school is not the time to date.  Have tons of friends and lots of fun, but don’t waste time trying to maintain a relationship.

30. Have a good cup of tea every day.  It is good for the soul.  Plus, it is pretty.

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31. Sex makes babies.  That is what is was created for.  If you aren’t ready to be a mom, then you aren’t ready to have sex.  

32. Sex makes babies.  That is what it was created for.  If you aren’t ready to be a mom, then you aren’t ready to have sex.  Yes, I know that I just said that twice.  It is that important.

33. It is okay to be alone.  Learn to enjoy your own company.

34. When you’re ready for a relationship, find someone who makes doing the dishes fun.

35. Don’t go into a relationship (friend or romantic) thinking you can change someone.  You can’t.

36. Your self-worth should NEVER depend on an outside source.  Before you can be happy with someone else, you have to be happy with yourself.

37. If you want to know how a man should treat you, watch your dad.

38. Remember that everything we have has taken years to build.

39. Make them chase you.  And know that the chase should never end just because you’ve been “caught.”

40. If you want something to last, then leaving is not an option.  Never walk out the door when you are angry.  Space is not what you need.  I know I said to make them chase you, but if you are walking out the door to get someone to chase you, you will be disappointed.  Chances are they have no idea that’s what you want them to do.  Other people can’t read your mind (See #11).  Walking out the door will not make them chase you.  In that moment, you don’t need to be chased…what you need is to lock the door and fix the problem.

41. Clean up messes as they happen.  This rule isn’t just for the kitchen.  It applies in every area of your life.

42. It is okay to have arguments.  Just don’t ever let them go unsettled.

43. Jealousy is not attractive.  It is okay for you to want someone or something to be wholly yours.  But if you ever find yourself with someone who isn’t willing to be wholly yours, then you are wasting your time.  Move.  On.

44. Broken hearts happen.  They suck, but when the tears dry, you know exactly what you do and don’t want.

45. Fairytales aren’t real (I wrote a whole post about that HERE).  Real love is choosing the same person every day, even when the “butterflies” of love fade in and out.  True love is the choice to stay even on the days when the butterflies are dormant.  Great love stories only happen after years of hard work.  Don’t let that bum you out though…It is totally worth it.

46. Remember to go against the grain.  Doing what everyone else has done will only get you to where everyone else has gotten.  Dare to dream, and then do it.

47. Never stop learning.  Read a book and then read another.  Learning makes you grow, and if you aren’t growing, you’re dying.  Learning will keep you happy.

48. Collect memories and experiences.  The newness of “things” will quickly fade, but when you collect memories, you collect an experience that will never lose its value.

49. You’re never too old to need your mom and dad, and you are always, always welcome to come home.

50. No matter what happens, always remember that I love you more.

I hope that you can share this message with your girls, as well.

Don’t forget to do this:

 

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